hush hush, i've already spoken

So I thought about doing the daily blog thing and obviously it failed because I am lacking about 5 posts. haha.  So I resolved that maybe I'll just blog as often as I can, as much as I can remember, because I'm pretty exhausted. I'm lucky that I got 2 days off of rotations this week because let me tell you, going to the city every day and taking the 545 am train is tiring. EXHAUSTING! And to top it all off, running an 11 hour day, getting up to 12 almost when I finally get home. DAG! But my proudest moment has got to be that I did it, I survived, and I'm still here. I learned a lot about myself and about how brave I can be, because even though I'm not in California, this is a lot for me. I'm a little bit closer to finding out what I want to do with my life; you would have thought by the 6th year I would know. Nope, still don't. haha ..

On a similar note, my rotation is going well.. being in a cubicle can get really mentally challenging because you're not allowed to take naps. LOL. Just kidding, but really, it gets pretty tough. I am learning a lot about a side of the pharmaceutical industry that I didn't know was as important as it is, and it's helping tie everything together. It's also very, very, very nice being able to walk around Central Park and Park Avenue on my lunch breaks with my classmate Paul. And getting fruit. I love New York fruit stands! One week is already finished and another week is starting .. 4 more weeks and then I'll be downtown. I guess this year will go by faster than I thought. I hope I manage to accomplish everything I set out to do, and I hope I get a good grade doing it. LOL. There's a lot of things in store for the rotation like meetings and things, so yay. I think I need to caffeinate for the rest of the rotation though, these hours keep getting tougher but at the same time I'm getting used to it. Oh well .. I still have to explore all the fun things at my fingertips! That is, if I still have the energy. LOL ..

There is still unfinished work that I have to do left over from the past year that I feel badly about not doing. I don't know if my research work is still worth turning in; Sam says it is but I don't have any motivation to do it.. except maybe guilt. I keep telling myself to do it but to no avail. Instead, I'm on facebook trying to connect to people because I feel like I haven't seen anyone in a long time. I guess you never realize how lonely you are until you are left alone. I wish there was more time, more opportunities, less work .. but I guess that is what comes with growing up. With getting a job. This sucks! haha. I think I have to give myself an internal deadline to finish it, then just hand it in, paid or not, to clear my conscience. I hate the fact that I'm like, escaping my problems, but I guess that's the way things go. After all, being on rotation is like, people can't find you since you're not at Rutgers anymore. Le sigh .. oh the high anxiety. 

I'm definitely excited for my off cycle so I can finally take a break and do nothing. My mom wants to go on vacation for a week somewhere and Jackie is thinking about coming out. I hope she does, and I hope we go somewhere for a little bit, because being in school from approximately August 2008 until May 2010 with no official break-ish is kind of rough. Off cycles are nice! YAY. 


Well anyways, I guess I'll be off  to reading my report and things and et cetera. I hope you have a wonderful Memorial Day! Catch you next time :)